Downsized. Now what?

Let me explain.

by: paris barrie

First, you take the painkillers, OTC of course. Then, maybe a drink, or two.

I know from personal experience, because I know what it's like to lose a job. Only this time around it was different. It was my husband who lost his job and we had two kids. Downright objectionable. Life wasn't supposed to be like this. I always had heard that if you work hard.....things would work out...for the better. Not like this.

So here's the back story. Talk about adjusting to life. And, recognizing you don't always have control.

After the new reality set in, we set about attempting transformation. Ever tried it? It's a bitch. Well, put more politically correct, it's like trying to fit a square peg into a round hole. Not always the easiest thing to do.

Let me explain further. We both had corporate backgrounds. You know, where there's often a thousand people working for the good of one entity.

But now, the landscape had changed. Gone was the large corporate entity with its safety in numbers philosophy.

And we were on our own. Ouch!

So what did we do? We bought a business. After all, if you can't get a job IN the business world, what's the next best thing to do? You got it. Buy one.

17....and counting

by: paris barrie

Let me explain.

It was going to be an epic night.

I danced in front of the mirror for awhile, turned the lights down low in my room, shut my door, pulled out my laptop and texted Joe and Ken. Spring Breeaaak. Sank into my favorite J brand pants, moved from bedroom to bathroom and back again to make sure I looked good.

I studied my face in the mirror, the way the girl down the hall studies for exams. Looked at myself from every angle to make sure he would like, would think, I’m beautiful. Hair’s perfect. Stretches down to the middle of my back.

Natty, Jess, Mel, they all dropped by, one by one, ready to get ready to go out. No rush. No problems.

My mother called. Loudly. She asked me something. Can’t make it out. Something about finishing, what?? She was always calling my name.

Passed the mirror. Saw the reflection. I looked good, and nodded approvingly to myself. Even winked. I loved the brilliance to my hair, the way it drapes to the side. Maybe I should cut it a little, but otherwise it’s perfect.

The car pulled up. Never getting out of the car, he stood up into the night, straight out of the car seat and up through the car roof, and smiled at me. We all piled in, ready for the city. The top was down, still. It was gonna be a good night.

My mother called again. This time her voice was clear. She said my name.

And then I woke up.

Okay, it WAS a DREAM.

Age wise, I am something after Bombeck, but before Dooce.com.http://www.dooce.com/. I haven’t had an epic night in well, can’t remember what year. Not completely true, but it’s not going into print.

When did this happen? When did the doorbell stop ringing for me to go out?? When did it start that the car honking its horns was for the neighbors’ kids? When did carpooling replace commuting?? Or rather, when did I add on carpooling in addition to commuting, and drop like a rock at the end of the day. When did 6 AM become a part of the morning schedule and not just a number on my clock, one that I would scoff at an hour before, and roll over for more sleep.

Brings me back to the line, it’s never just one thing. (And it never is.) Well, that’s why I am here. Two kids, one dog, okay one husband, a house, a mortgage, and it all adds up to TAKING 6 AM, well, seriously.

Is it time to change the sheets?

by: paris barrie

Let me explain.

When is it the right time to change the sheets? An old timetable for this routine household duty was once a week. Makes sense. Or does it?

I remember my own mother ironing those clean sheets each week, bless her. If she was ironing, it had to be a Sunday. This was a ritual that took place after Sunday Mass and breakfast, but before Sunday dinner. Out came the iron, the ironing board and spray starch, for that crisp, "new" to the touch feel.

But then came no wrinkle, no fuss sheets. And my own personal perspective on this is the day of changing and ironing those sheets once a week has come and gone. Pretty much up there with the laundry line and writing your checks. Gone. Passe. Yesterday. Everyone has come to know and love online banking. With just one click, ya’ pay a bill, monthly.

So, in my own personal quest to strip myself of time-consuming household duties, I hereby declare the weekly ritual of changing the sheets, outdated. History. It’s time to change the time frame. Create a more realistic schedule, if you will. I’m up for suggestions. But, I’m all for once a month, at best.

My advice: stay flexible. Don’t pen yourself in to any particular set of rules. After all, as they say, rules are meant to be broken. In this case, updated to fit the new reality.

I think it was Erma Bombeck who was quoted as saying that housework done properly might kill you. I don’t think I’ve ever agreed with anything more. So, what about switching things around, and going without any sheets just for the night or two? You’re downright frugal that way. Saves on the water bill.

And how timely--talk about going green. And the clean sheets are right there in the closet for the next night.